No Summer Fun For You!

The girlies are with Nana and Papa for week. I had BIG PLANS. Yes I did. Fate intervened instead.

1. On Wednesday, I (stupidly) got sunburned (the cooler temp and low humidity seduced my into thinking I didn't need sunblock when I went swimming). Then later that day, I broke my little toe. So I spent all day yesterday laying in bed watching TV/movies and/or reading and occasionally moaning in pain.

2. On the flipside, I did get to watch the Dixie Chick's documentary Shut Up and Sing. It was wonderful. I would encourage everyone to see it. Whether or not you agree with what Natalie Maines said back in 2003, she didn't deserve death threats. Also, I am now obsessed with their song Easy Silence. Guh. Perfect example of what my friend Katie calls non-romantic love songs.

3. I also managed to get a deal out of our cable company that locks in the price of our phone/internet/cable service at $89 for the next 18 months. Sweet! Before my injuries, I also weeded the flower bed and garden, mowed the front yard and did tons of laundry. So I guess the week hasn't been a total loss.

4. James and I are supposed to go to a sit down dinner for adults at church tonight, but that would mean putting on a bra and real shoes. I don't think my shoulders/back and little toe are up for those stresses. :P

5. I'm now off to watch my Season Two DVDs of Friday Night Lights with the commentary on. I'm telling y'all, you should really watch this show. Best show on TV, hands down.

Trashy Romance Novel Review

I had so many requests for a review of this book, I just had to give the people what they want! ;)



I'm amazed that someone got paid to write this book. I'm even more surprised that someone would pay *looks at the cover* $3.99 to purchase it!

The most ridiculous scene is near the beginning. Jared, the hero, invites Christabel, the heroine, and her daughter over for dinner at his house. Let me share with you the scene, from the purity of the text:

"She looked up to see Jared emerging from the veranda...His white shirt was unbuttoned, flapping open as he walked, revealing black curls nestled on his deeply tanned chest and a fine line of hair arrowing down, disappearing below the belt line of his white shorts. Snug, sexy shorts, leaving most of his muscular legs bare. His flagrant maleness caught the breath in Christabel's throat."

That's hawt. I only wish all of my dates had shown up wearing an open shirt and tight short shorts. But I gotta give the author some credit. Thanks to her descriptions, I think I can really picture in my mind just what Jared looks like.



*snort*

This is on page 34, and by page 57 they're on their way to a glorious night full of HAWT!Sex, even though it can only be one night, due to a secret lurking in Christabel's past (DUN DUN DUN). The secret comes out on page 111, (Christabel had an arranged marriage to a cold and distant man from a powerful family. He died in speedboating accident under mysterious circumstances when she was 5 months pregnant. Christabel's daughter is the sole heir of the family and will inherit $600 million on her 18th birthday, and Christabel is scared someone will try and kidnap her for ransom) and the book is over and done with by page 186, with Jared and Christabel happily marrying.

*pauses*

With $600 million to work with, you'd think Christabel would hire some bodyguards are something if she was so afraid her child would be kidnapped. But Christabel doesn't want her daughter growing up a "designer-clad little miss", so she instead hides out in a caravan on an Australian beach. There's some good logic for ya!

*unpauses*

All throughout the book, even before they do the deed, Christabel refers to Jared as "The Pleasure King". She even refers to herself as the Pleasure King's Bride", and no one finds this strange. I don't know about the men in y'alls lives, but if I started referring to the DH as "the Pleasure King" in a non-ironic manner, he'd wonder what the hell was wrong with me.

If all this weren't enough, there's a bit of cultural insensitivity/boderline racism thrown in for good measure! The King family has an 80 year old Chinese housekeeper named Vikki Chan (and she is always referred to by both names in the book, which annoys me for some reason) who has been with the family for three generations. She's a fabulous cook, even making the family eat all their meals with chopsticks, so they can fully appreciate her mad skillz. Vikki Chan is the fount of all knowledge and wisdom, popping in at the most random of times to give much needed sage advice.

She's also a pimp.

She knows everything that goes on with the family, and happily arranges things so she can take care of Christabel's daughter, thereby allowing Jared and Christbel to get it on without having to worry about being interrupted.

On Goodreads, I gave the book one star. The books was just dumb and boring. The character and plot development were pretty non-existent. There wasn't even any turgid nipples or throbbing loins to laugh at! ;D This is supposed to be part of a series featuring the King Brothers. ("The Cattle King's Mistress" and "The Playboy King's Wife" being the other two. Isn't the author extremely clever with that play-on-words of their last name??!?!?) Sadly, I felt the need to seek out these other books, and I have put in a hold request at the library. They should be arriving any day now. ;)

I Was Tagged!

The lovely Laura tagged me for this survey. (She is my sister-in-law, but we've never even met! How sad is that?? We need to rectify that situation, Laura! ;D)

How to play this game. Post these rules on your blog; List 3 joys, 3 fears, 3 goals, 3 current obsessions/collections, 3 random surprising facts about yourself. Tag 5 people at the end of your post by leaving their names....

3 Joys
1. My family
2. A good book
3. Sitting at the beach with the sand between my toes and the wind in my hair, watching the waves

3 Fears
1. Conjoined Twins
2. Not being a good wife and mother
3. Clowns

3 Goals
1. Finish college
2. Travel to Europe and the British Isles
3. Hike at least part of the Applachian trail in all of the states it goes through

3 Current obsessions/collections
1. Working my way through Nigella Lawson and Ina Garten's cookbooks
2. British Entertainment: BBC Costume Dramas, Top Gear, The Vicar of Dibley, The Graham Norton Show, Absolutely Fabulous, North & South (No, not the one with Patrick Swayze. This one, featuring the extremely dreamy Richard Armitage. *swoons*), Robin Hood (also featuring Richard Armitage), etc.
3. Reading all of the books an my night stand and in my library pile.

3 Random surprising facts about myself
1. I sleep with a sleep mask. I think my eyes are permanently damaged from trying to sleep all those years with Dad's Christmas light display shining directly into our bedroom window. Thanks Dad!
2. I've worn glasses since I was ten. I've tried three different times to wear contacts, trying out the different options, and they never worked. I think I got this from my mom. Thanks, Mom!
3. I love going to the movies and discovering we're the only ones in the theatre. It makes me feel very special- likes it's our own private screening!

I am now tagging Stacey, Shauna, Helen, Vickie and Jed!

As If There Was Any Question

I've had a pretty good week, ego wise.

First, there was the great response to my post on the trashy romance novels I got from the library, both here and at my LJ. (I have several reviews that will go up in the next few days. You're giddy with anticpation, aren't you?)

Then on Monday, a sister from church stopped by to drop off something and told me my hydrangea bush was the most beautiful she had ever seen. I have to admit, it's pretty gorgeous. I was afraid we had cut it back too far last fall, but it practically doubled in size over the winter.



Yesterday was Missionary Zone Conference, and I'm the meal coordinator. (Which means I provide lunch for 45 missionaries, plus the Mission President and his wife once every six weeks.) This week the menu was BBQ sandwiches, potato salad, my world famous (okay, family famous) baked beans and The Pioneer Woman's Apple Dumplings with vanilla ice cream (which are TO DIE FOR). By the way the crowd responded, you'd have thought I served . Everything was a hit, especially the Apple Dumplings. Needless to say, getting told OVER and OVER again how great your food is can boost your ego quite a bit.

Today, as if I wasn't already convinced of how great I am, this package came in the mail today.



It's only Thursday. I am sure more proof of my awesomeness will be forthcoming the rest of the week.

How awesome is J.K. Rowling??

I don't know if any of y'all have listened to the commencement speech JKR gave at Harvard yesterday. (You can read the transcript right here). That woman is simply amazing. Whether or not you like her books, it's evident to me, just by this speech alone, that she is a wonderful human being.

Maybe it's because I haven't had the opportunity to listen to a college commencement speech of my own (yet! hope springs eternal :P), but JKR's words are really resonating with me.

Here are just a few snippets that you might one day see over in a sidebar.

"So why do I talk about the benefits of failure? Simply because failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me. Had I really succeeded at anything else, I might never have found the determination to succeed in the one arena I believed I truly belonged. I was set free, because my greatest fear had already been realised, and I was still alive, and I still had a daughter whom I adored, and I had an old typewriter and a big idea. And so rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life..."

"Life is difficult, and complicated, and beyond anyone’s total control, and the humility to know that will enable you to survive its vicissitudes."

"If you choose to use your status and influence to raise your voice on behalf of those who have no voice; if you choose to identify not only with the powerful, but with the powerless; if you retain the ability to imagine yourself into the lives of those who do not have your advantages, then it will not only be your proud families who celebrate your existence, but thousands and millions of people whose reality you have helped transform for the better. We do not need magic to change the world, we carry all the power we need inside ourselves already: we have the power to imagine better."

In addition to all this, she also made jokes about gay wizards and valuable photographic evidence should any of her university friends decide to run for Prime Minister. Hee!

But seriously, God bless her for speaking about the benefits of failure! Ten years ago, I couldn't even begin to imagine the failure I was going to be facing. (Thank God I didn't know!) I have been at that rock bottom place. But like JKR, I realized I had a solid foundation, and I built my life back from there, and to be perfectly honest, I'm still building.

My biggest regret is that I have let fear control my life. JKR is such a great example of not giving fear that power. Excuse my if I sound too fangirl-y, but JKR is one of my modern day heroes, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Especially after a speech like the one she gave at Harvard yesterday.

BOOKS!

I know I have a bad habit of buying books (mostly on the recommendation of friends) then waiting forever and a day before I get around to reading them. I just realized how bad this habit acutally is.

If I *just* read all the books piled on my nightstand



plus the books I've had to move to the main bookshelves because there was no more room on said nightstand, I'd have enough books to read one book a day for THREE MONTHS!

That doesn't even take into account the books from the library that are awaiting my attention.



I am hereby putting myself on a Book Buying Fast for the month of June. It's the only way to control the insanity. In other news- it's that time of year again! Yes, my local library has put out the grab bags full of books for only twenty-five cents! You'll remember last year's grab bag was kind of a bust (hee!) because of false advertising. (If a trashy romance novel is titled My Seduction, then there should actually be a seduction in said book, right?) Let's see what looks promising in this year's bag, shall we?



Now, these bags are 95% full of trashy romance novels. I buy them mostly for the LOLZ. This year's batch did not disappoint on that front.



Her Baby, His Secret? Classic. (Although I wonder how someone like Maeve Binchy, who actually has a pretty respectable mainstream career, made it in with this group??)



Oh yes! JACKPOT!! How can you not stop what your doing and pick up Let's Make a Baby! (please to be noting the exclamation point!) Or what about Tall, Dark & Western? Nice. Although I think my favorite might just be Marriage Incorporated. I can't wait to find out if this book is about a mail-order bride company.

There seems to be a theme to a few of these books.



Babies everywhere! Although, I think we can guess that the couple in Let's Make a Baby! are successful in actually making a baby, seeing as how there is a pregnant woman on the cover. SPOLIER ALERT!!! :P Wait, though. What's up with Her Baby, His Secret??



Hello, chest hair! I like a little bit of the welcome mat as much as the next gal, but come one! And I find it strangely suspicious that a guy with that much chest hair has absolutely hairless arms. Even the baby is weirded out by it! Maybe that's part of the mystery alluded to on the cover???

I was also lucky enough to get TWO books from Silhouette's Man of the Month series. Man #1 is Tall, Dark & Western. The blurb on the back says his name is "...Marty Stryker, cowboy extraordinaire and sexy husband-to-be". Hmmm. Most of the cowboys I've met all have names like Cash, Ty and Cody.



Man of the Month #2 doesn't get a snappy title, just Gabriel's Gift.


Let's see if the blurb on the back is more interesting.



Holy cultural insensitivity, Batman! Did Cassie Edwards write this book? "A man's instincts are still to hunt and bring the woman to his lair." - Gabriel Deerhorn, Native American mountain man.

Yikes. Sounds like good, clean fun! :P


I haven't read any of them yet, but I'll let you know all the exciting details when I do.

Movies

The girlies and I *finally* saw Prince Caspian today. I liked the movie a lot, though not as much as TLtWatW. The viewing experience was somewhat hampered by the other people in the theatre with us.

There was a woman and a preteen-ish boy together, and then a family of two adults and four kids. The members of the larger family kept moving around, leaving the theatre, dropping stuff which made loud crashes, etc. The mom's cell phone went off right as the movie was starting. To her credit, she turned it off right away, but she had to root around in her purse a good twenty seconds or so before she found it. And I swear various family members must have left the theatre at least ten times. I don't think they were intentionally being rude, just oblivious.

Then, after the movie was over, we made a pit stop in the restroom. I opened the door to see the preteen boy standing there! After double checking that we were actually in the Ladies Room (which we were :P), we walked in. The boy's mom then came out of one of the stalls. I'm all for child safety, and it must be difficult if you're out with your child(ren) who happen to be the opposite sex of yourself. But once they hit about ten or so they don't need to be in the restroom *with* you!

Anyway,

As I said we liked it a lot. However, it seems as if the filmmakers watched LotR one too many times and said, "Yeah, that how *our* battles need to look!". And then when the Ents trees showed up, I couldn't help but laugh. But it was good, and there aren't a lot of "kids" films that don't pander to the kids.

And is there something wrong with me in that I still find Mr. Tumnus more attractive than Prince Caspian?

Gardening

Three plants fell victim to Isabella's overzealous weeding tonight- a bell pepper plant, cilantro, and a marigold.

Oops.

In her defense, these plants were quite small and weed-like looking. Luckily we have three other bell pepper bushes that are about ready to start bearing fruit and another small thing of cilantro (I just put it in a week ago).

We harvested Madeline's ginormous cabbage last week, and reckon it came in close to 20 lbs. As it got bigger, we kept breaking off the bottom leaves because they kept crowding the tomatoes and peppers. The root stem was at least three inches in diameter. Madeline actually had a hard time holding the cabbage, it was so heavy! I plan on cooking it some time this week for dinner. Hopefully it will be very tasty!





I'm really proud of our little garden. We've already picked a few jalapenos and cherry tomatoes. All of the herbs are doing great. All of the tomato plants are loaded, and I can't wait to eat them!